recent thoughts

recent thoughts

all the em dashes are typed by me

these two weeks at f inc have felt magical.

I keep learning that there are certain things in life I can’t control.

What I need to do now is to run into those things more aggressively.

Learn to change what seems unchangeable, learn to let go when I can’t control something, and learn from the feedback. I don’t like to fail - if I can win (well, this is very subjective; everyone wins differently), I’ll do everything I can to make it happen. But at the same time, I want to fail. I wanna see what I’m capable of. I wanna see how I’m being shaped by the thing I’m pushing, especially when it’s something people instinctively step back from.

I haven’t regretted a single moment since the day I learned that “starting something” is the thing. I’m learning so much more. I feel some kind of discomfort every day, which is so comforting. I’m evolving and changing every single day. When I look at myself in the mirror, I know that even if this were the last day of my life, the only difference would be that I’d call my mom, dad, and grandparents in addition to doing what I’d already planned.

Every day, I feel extremely happy and grateful to be doing this with Iana. Even though I’m doing and prioritizing the same things, every day feels profoundly different. I also get very energized by putting myself and the things I’m doing out in public, sharing them with everyone who might be interested.

I’m very experimental- I’m willing to risk immense suffering in my own life to make good lives possible and multiply. Most of the time, I have a strong feeling about what to do. I’m also super sure about the things I don’t want in my life, and I don’t want to compromise.

One thing I need is to create and generate. The other is to talk to people. The final thing is to sleep. Beyond what I need to survive, I only need these three things.

If two things could change my life for the better, I’m going to go with the new and unfamiliar one.

I hate experience-driven statements. This is very different from “I hate experience”- I simply don’t like it when people look at something and instinctively turn to the past for support and reference. I like future-driven statements.

I dont like experience driven thinking as much as future driven thinking

I’m decently good at having fun. I was fortunate to have parents who naturally appreciate art, beauty, and design. They also taught me to defend whatever vision I have. I’m grateful that I grew up watching the people around me turn the impossible into the possible. It made me helplessly optimistic about technology.

Running a game studio taught me how fun and hard creation can be. I can’t become too obsessed with the work or too obsessed with talking to people- there’s a careful balance there. It’s easy to become a little too consumed by either selling or building. Both are so intriguing that I really gotta be careful. If I overbuild or oversell, the cost of correcting the imbalance could be more than I can afford.

I rarely care about anything, but when I do, I care a lot, and it can be a bit overwhelming. I only realized this recently. I just have to learn to make my life less intense.

about top 1% i think about it this way: being sure I’m in the top 1% at something is what helps me become one of the best at it. And no benchmark can truly measure genius, obsession, or what it means to be exceptional. I’m glad people aren’t benchmarking quirkiness too.